Listen

I love a new tune. 

Sometimes when I hear my favorite song or a new “potentially could become” my favorite song I have to stop everything and just…listen. I can’t be half hearing in a noisy kitchen or driving with half attention on the road and half on the music. I will tell everyone SHHH! and maybe even pull over just to hear the song. Just so I can clearly hear what I want to hear. Is it the same with you? We hear what we want to hear and listen to what we want to listen to, don’t we?

‍

Why don’t we listen well to each other?

Most of the time in conversation with someone we are thinking about our response or retort. Most of the time we feel the need to interrupt because what we have to share is so much better than what the other is saying. Or maybe they’re wrong and we can’t wait to straighten them out. 

Or what about listening inside to ourselves? Sadly, it seems to be a lost skill.

‍

More than ever, we are experiencing a dearth of people who know how to listen.

Did you know the word listen appears over 1500 times in the Bible? Listening is a sacred art. A way of being aware of and holding the value of the other person as precious. It is being present to the one and only other as the one and only you.

I watched one time as a small child was trying to get his mother’s attention. She was chatting for what seemed like a long time to another adult and the child very carefully, but firmly took his hands and holding his mom’s face, turned it toward him. “Mommy, listen to me!” he pleaded.

Don’t we want that? Don’t we wish people would dignify us with their full attention? I am also guilty of not always offering that gift to others. Sometimes the siren song of multitasking or that stupid phone just gets loud and we succumb.

Distraction wins out over people. 

The task trumps a friend.

Media beats out loved ones.

‍

How could learning to listen change our relationships for the better? How would we change if we learned to listen?

• In order to learn to listen we have to start by being quiet ourselves to access that still point in us. It’s ok to be quiet, by the way. 
• Then pause. If you’re in a conversation just breathe and tune yourself to where you are and with whom. Don’t rush into a response. 
• Presence is key to listening. Once you become present you can become aware and connect with the person or situation you are with on a heart level. 

Practice this in your ordinary life. While washing your hands, doing dishes or making your bed, while in conversation with your spouse or a friend, or while hearing your child’s important story for the 5th time in a row. Give yourself a few minutes every day to practice deep listening. You will increase your awareness and you will begin to see transformation in your relationship with God, yourself and others.

Nothing is more valuable than you and the people around you.

Learning how to listen is learning how to love.

‍

Join Me as We Try to Listen and Love More

‍